A Calls it Quits

Picture Source: almightydad.com

Four weeks ago yesterday, A quit nursing cold turkey. I thought maybe I wouldn't blog about this because this really isn't applicable for most of my readers, but for the few for whom this is relevant, I wanted  to share my experience in the hopes that it is helpful for you.

Since I started enjoying nursing (it took about 3 weeks) I had planned to nurse until A was 12 months old, the AAP recommendation.

A nursed as usual when we woke up on November 12 (his 9 month birthday), and then refused to nurse for his second morning feeding. I didn't think anything of it and gave him some bananas and cereal. Then at lunch, he refused again. At that point, I had to give him a bottle because he needed the nutrients. When he refused again that afternoon, I started looking online. I'll tell you right now, in the 4 weeks I've been trying to figure this out, I haven't found anything helpful, and this blog won't offer you any new insights either. Everything I read said "a majority of infants don't quit nursing on their own until around 18 months of age." This, of course, makes me feel like a failure. My research told me this was most likely a nursing strike, perhaps due to teething or just a growing independence. I was under the impression it might last 2-7 days.

When 7 days came and went (at this point we had stocked up on formula to supplement the bottles of frozen breast milk), I researched the longest nursing strike: 18 days. So I figured I'd give it 18 days and then figure out what I'd do. I pumped and got enough milk to give him a bottle of breast milk a day. The rest of the day he'd get formula.

I called the Health Partners Lactation consultants and got no help from the nurse with whom I spoke. She told me that when her little one went on a nursing strike, she simply told him "this is where your milk comes from. You get it here, or not at all." Um, not going to work for me. My son goes to day care, so he already knows that's not true. She told me to not offer him an alternative, but I'm not going to refuse to give my son nutrients to teach him where milk should come from. And she told me the reason most babies quit nursing this young is not their choice, but because the mother gives up. Thanks for making me feel like crap, and not helping me find a real solution to the problem.

If you experience the same situation, do not feel bad. You can grieve the change in your relationship with your child, but then move on. Trust that you've done all you can and trust that you will make the best choices for yourself and for your child.

When the 18 days passed, I decided I'd pump enough milk to have a bottle a day for him until he's 12 months old. Ufda, that is 100 times harder than nursing exclusively. I'm not going to make it. And quite frankly, my supply won't either.

I woke up this morning with A, and I just didn't have it in me to pump. So I guess without really making a decision, I've made the choice to call it quits.

It took me 4 weeks to come to terms with this, but as Nate reminded me a few weeks ago, if I continue to set my heart on fulfilling all my plans, I will continue to be disappointed. I don't get to make such detailed plans as a parent. I'm okay with my decision. A had 9 months of breastfeeding and then made his own decision to exert his independence. His favorite way to take a bottle is standing up, holding on to the table. Not really an option with a breast. I hope it's a sign of good parenting to recognize what he needs and allow him to fulfill those needs in a healthy way.

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My Post Black Friday Walk of Shame

I am probably at my worst social responsibility-wise on Black Friday. Growing up, my parents and I stayed in and decorated for Christmas on Black Friday, or what I used to call simply the Day after Thanksgiving. Then, I started dating Nate. In order to prove my mettle to his bargain hunting family, I had to get up at 3 am to line up at Best Buy 7 years ago. I held my own, holding the line to check out while the rest of the family scrounged up the best bargains. 7 years later, I find myself in the line at Shopko, taking the lead on pulling coveted items off the shelves and politely telling 13-year-old girls to go to the back of the line (and yes, I really was polite).

This Black Friday was a milestone for me because it's the first (of many, I'm sure) hunting for the best deals for my son's Christmas presents. 

However, my shopping spree gives me nothing to blog about. In fact, I'm so consumerist that I'm ashamed to blog about the experience at all. I didn't even bother to bring our reusable bags!! 

The dark side of my shopping hit me when I opened my new, much needed memory foam contour pillow to find a warning that I should air out the pillow for 48 hours because it's a petroleum-based product with natural chemical odors. What was I thinking? I can't sleep on this for the next 5 years! (Which is how long I've been sleeping on my old pillow, thus the permanent crick in my neck.) But oh, I laid my head on my new pillow and it is sooo comfortable! 

I'll be doing some further research to decide if I need to give up my own bargain in lieu of something more eco friendly (and that I feel good about breathing in every night) or if I can keep it because it's not as bad as the warning suggests.

Between that and the pound of tissue paper and cardboard Nate pulled out of his 7 new work shirts, I'm feeling the post-Black Friday shame. 

I'm Back!

Wow, have I ever been a slacker!! I have no excuse for my absence from blogging except that I am fully immersed in motherhood. Our little guy is 9 months old, crawling, pulling up on things, clapping, and babbling away, and I don't want to miss a minute! But since I want my son to grow up in a socially responsible world, I'm summoned back to the blog.

With winter in full swing in Minnesota, this tip will be easier to implement than ever. Take your shoes off when you come inside. Shoes track in the chemicals you've sludged through all day. In addition, this will keep your floors cleaner, thus requiring less cleaning.

Image borrowed from Around Hawaii

Source: Safer Chemicals 

Fish

There are many foods that are no-no's when you are pregnant. Most people will tell you to avoid certain types of fish that are high in mercury. The challenge is that fish is a very good thing to eat when you are pregnant because it provides a lot of omega-3s, which are great for baby's developing brain. This, of course, led me to extensive research about which fish were low enough in mercury to eat while pregnant.
We continue to avoid high-mercury fish because it's still a risk for my breast-feeding baby, and I really don't see the point in eating mercury laden fish when there are many safer options. Below is the list of safe fish, fish to eat in moderation, and fish to avoid while pregnant. I have found Super Target to have a surprisingly wide selection of safe frozen fish. The Market Pantry Wild-caught Alaskan Salmon is great and relatively inexpensive.

Safe Fish-fish that are high in omega-3s and low in mercury. Doctors say up to 2 6 oz. servings a week are safe, and even recommended.
farmed abalone, farmed catfish, farmed clams, stone crab, king crab, flounder, haddock, atlantic mackerel, farmed mussels, wild Alaskan or pacific salmon (we eat a lot of this), canned wild pink or sockeye salmon, sardines, bay scallops, farmed scallops, northern shrimp, Oregon shrimp, spot prawns, farmed striped bass, farmed sturgeon, farmed trout, butterfish, calamari, Pollock, whitefish, ocean perch, flounder, hake, herring, spiny/rock lobster, shad, sole, crawfish/crayfish, clams, tilapia, freshwater trout

Eat in Moderation-no more than 6 6 oz servings per month.

• carp, mahi mahi, Dungeness crab, snapper, blue crab, atlantic herring, snow crab, monkfish, freshwater perch, skate, cod, Canned light chunk tuna, fresh Pacific Albacore tuna

Avoid-these are too high in mercury. This applies for everything baby eats until 1 year of age.

• king mackerel, Atlantic salmon, Chilean sea bass, shark, unidentified or farmed shrimp, swordfish, tilefish, canned albacore white tuna, orange roughy, grouper, marlin, bass saltwater, croaker, halibut, fresh bluefin tuna, ahi tuna, sea trout, bluefish, American/Maine lobster.

Cloud Computing

Nate insists that his eco-friendly activities get shared as well, so this week's post is about cloud computing. I guess it's something we both do, but he takes advantage of it much more as a tech junkie.

Cloud computing is essentially storing your data in a centralized location out of your computer. The hardware is not at your site. Because you don't have to pay for very expensive, top-of-the-line hardware yourself, you save money. In addition, because the information is stored off site, you can access your data from anywhere.

More importantly, but consolidating the energy that all of us use during computing to one central location, we reduce the energy used. "A recent report by the Carbon Disclosure Project (CDP) and Verdantix estimates that cloud computing has the potential to reduce global carbon emissions by millions of metric tons (Google Blog-Gmail: It's Cooler in the Cloud)."

Nearly everyone is already cloud computing without thinking of it-email, Google docs, Facebook, etc. We can make conscious choices to do even more. Dropbox is one free option. This program allows you to easily upload data from your computer and access it from anywhere.

Look for other ways to increase your cloud computing and decrease your carbon emissions even more.